To Kill A Blog

It was like a damnable dream one was unable to relinquish, a fiery fury of imagery layered over my days like a funereal shroud. Inescapable in it's beauty routine became untenable, the chaos of the plan swamped my every impulse, every breath an exhalation of expectation, every step a move of delicious intent. A scheme flourishing like a fleshy fungus in the shadowy realms of my fantasies, sprouting in an unseen world yet bursting with brutal vitality.
The reality of the deal more comforting now, like the lights of home after a long journey, to be without it's machinations is to be without hope, to be a sunrise with no one to witness it.
The act itself will be a performance to applaud, a most glorious final act to an epic penned in heartache and treachery which the scholars will be bewildered about until the end of the age of Aquarius, until their lives become entwined in the unravelled coils of their learning, they will find themselves wanting at the doors of judgement, failures before the eyes of their god knowledge, cast down into the bowers of unpredictability. Cowering in the blackness of exquisite nothingness and left with failing memories of what once was.

Conkers, Bunkers & Mouthwash

Down among the heather
And the problems that lie therein
No-one can find me hiding
Itself a matter of pride
Ever lasting mockery
Longing for safer times

Sometimes I lose for hours
Terrified and full of tears
Awaiting torturous ignorance
Invisible like a promise broken twice
Realising someone never told you
Murder with a dagger sharpened with lies
A time will come when it's better
Startling times never seen
Then will I rise from the heather
Even gaze up at the sun or the moon
Resurrection complete

So if all this is possible
Uncertainty made real with time
Clutching every teased moment
Know that I believe it
Someday the clouds will decline

Lies

Alien From Planet Earth

And anyway,
She floated from bar to bar
And everywhere, I saw her.
But she didn't understand
The language that I spoke
And though I know
She could have been the one,
She floated through me
At around 2am and twelve pints gone.
She's the alien from planet earth.
Make it wrong, make it right, make it wrong.

Eleven Letters

Nine letters.

Two Words

I can
only believe
when the
wind blows
a different
way away
from here.
Trees bend,
lovers leave.
Hearts grieve.
Everyone needs
the wind.

Lazy Tune

The piano's playing lazy tunes,
And the last train's pulling out
Carrying hearts left in ruins.

So pour another whiskey for the road
I'll be walking on soon.

Strike a light for the cigarettes
Of this world.
And those who could use one, too.

It's not so easy to hold on for someone
When you're not so old,
And not so young.

Old Timer

Old timer's at it again,
I saw him earlier,
pulling back the curtains
And hoping she'd be looking.

Old timer's singing again,
I heard him earlier,
Spinning his old records
To see if she'd come dancing.

Old timer's drinking again,
I saw him earlier,
Pouring out his troubles
And hoping she'd come running.

Old timer's crying again,
I heard him earlier,
And I'd finish this tale for you
But you know how it ends.

interlude

You're having a bad dream,
Don't let the wheel
Roll, and roll and roll
And roll and roll
And roll
And roll
And roll
And roll
Its way to you.
Don't let it roll away to you.

interlude

You're having a bad day
Don't let the clouds
Roll, and roll and roll
And roll and roll
And roll
And roll
And roll
And roll
Their rain to you.
Don't let them roll their rain to you.

interlude

You're having a bad night
Don't let your life
Roll, and roll and roll
And roll and roll
And roll
And roll
And roll
And roll
Away from you.
Don't let it roll away from you.

interlude

Alien Love

I'm in love with an alien,
She comes from a galaxy
Two billion light years from me.
And I've never met her
But it makes my head spin
To sense of her yearning.
Think I'll take off from this sphere
And gamble on my chances.
In a rocket,
Built from marzipan
And Strepsils tins.

Sad Clown

I'm a clown wearing
a rain-drenched raincoat
at a funeral
I've turned up late for
with plastic flowers for wreaths
squirting water at me
while wearing yellow boots
stood in red buckets
filled with tears.

Song

The word "brilliant" sounds like a word
You'd shy away from.
A little too-sure, a little far gone.

The word "brilliant" sounds like a word,
That you have foregone,
A bit of a bore, and probably wrong.

The word "brilliant" sounds like a word,
I've used along,
Out of my life, and out of my song.

I Am Your Cloak

I'm your essence,
You told me that yourself.
I'm your lifeblood
You said it as
You put me on your shelf.
And now it's just as though
you never spoke,
I am your cloak.

Time

I paused the DVD,
And put the TV on standby,
Took the tongue from the tick of the clock
By taking out its battery.

I closed the windows,
So the curtains would be still
And took the busy ants
From the windowsill.

I stopped the record from
Spinning sweet memories,
Then when I was complete,
She stopped my heartbeat.

Bright Dutch Painting

Storybook canvas,
There's a blue sky,
And a bird flies hard, as she flies down.
There's a farm in the background
With a red roof,
And a house to the side,
And the trees creep out from behind.
There's a hay bail, with a spade placed in.
And a windmill, with red sails,
And the year '1802' carved in.
Canals criss-cross the plain,
And washing dries on a line -
towels, socks and things.
A boat's moored by a bank,
And the pipe lets the water out
And lets the water in.
There's a hutch in a field in the foreground,
And nets where the fish might swim.
There's a family - two grown-ups, three kids
And they wave as the cow sails by on a crate,
With the ducks circling.
Lilipads give life to the canal,
And a single hen stands opposite,
On a lone bank, looking.

Note

Would James Cameron please hand in all his King of the World stationary. I'm sure with all the money you have raped from people with your 3-D Smurf movie you should be able to have some printed up that say "From the office of James Cameron ex-husband of Kathryn Bigelow."
And why no director's commentary on the DVD release of Piranha II: The Spawning?

One more balls up Cameron and you'll find yourself in The Hall of Shame with that other hapless poetically overrated buffoon; Daniel Stairmaster.

Names In The Sand

Let me take you to the beach,
And maybe I'll marry you by
writing your name in the sand
In a heart, with a grin.

And I will kiss you by the tide
Then maybe you'd marry me by
writing my name in the sand,
By a heart, for your sin.

Let me take you by the beach,
And let me show you life,
Our names written in the sand;
The sepia tide drawing in.

Everywhere

I can't walk around this town
Without reminders bearing down.
Now that she is nowhere
Why is she everywhere?

I can't sidestep Memory Lane,
Without a signpost to my pain.
Now that she is nowhere,
Why is she everywhere?

I can't touch her broken grave
Without a loss I'd hoped to save,
Now that you are nowhere
Why are you everywhere?

Fuck Off

If you trouble yourself for long enough
You can look out of your window
And see the remainder of my dignity
Slow-dance down the drain.

So do me a favour,
Before I leave.
Though I love you no matter what
And very much -
Just fuck off for now,
And let me breathe.

If you trouble yourself for long enough
You can look into my windows
And see the remainder of my dignity
Trickle down my face.

So do me a favour,
Before I leave.
Though I love you very much
no matter what.
Fuck off for now,
And let me grieve.